I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
