so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
