her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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