No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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