There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
