would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
