i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It's blow job season.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
