Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
