is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
