I'm gonna have a badass scar
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
