so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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