I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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