I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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