a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
