Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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