you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
