I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
