just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
