You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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