So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
