just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
