dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
