How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
