i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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