If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
