Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
