At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
