i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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