I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
