if you like me you must not know who I am
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I see more hoeing in ur future
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
