everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize