Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
