At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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