i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
