Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
porn star boner night. come get it.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
