found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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