I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
what day is it and did you see me today?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
