If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
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