They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
