I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
