Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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