You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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