Dual....:-)
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize