is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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