Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Randomize
