in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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