so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
