wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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