you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
