Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
vagina is talking i cant
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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